Ruminating

While one of my biggest assets is my ability to be adaptable, the blase', almost aimless approach I often take might be a little too passive.While I am often quite reflective, I don't often make as many tangible changes because of my approach.

I need to stay grounded and keep my head from getting lost in a world possibilities.Short-sightedness, narrow thinking and a lack of vision are three things I try to avoid, though most of my mental wanderings/ideas/planning/dreaming aren't really beneficial. They often cause me to doubt myself. When I am present and focus on what I am doing, I am generally pretty happy. There is nothing wrong with pausing and working on tangible improvements to my life, but the all-pervasive, second-guessing I frequently engage in doesn't usually do anything but bring anxiety and confusion (things like Facebook are good at helping to generate these thoughts). It rarely results in a plan or even a single step I might take to improve my lot. The question I should be asking should be simply, "does my situation make me unhappy" or "am I mostly responsible for my own unhappiness?" In either case, what concrete steps might I take to find a more enjoyable life. Wishing I had taken another career or educational path, wishing I had more money/looks/intelligence, or that old relationships had panned out doesn't do anything. Wishing I might change the world without participating in it is just self-indulgent fantasy.

I need more short terms goals, I need more self discipline, I need determination, I need a little more selflessness, I need to take a few more targeted risks, I need to seek out feedback from those who care about me.

To do that I need more alone time. I reflect on what I really value and what would be the most beneficial to those around me. I need to open my eyes to see the needs beyond my own narrow scope. This does not mean I should be unimaginative, but that I should focus only on the things I can actually hope to accomplish (and then maybe multiply by a factor of two for good measure). I need to focus on the short term and intermediate terms tasks that I need to execute on in order to carry out whatever vision I want to bring to life.