Procrastination

I read a book on procrastination a while back and came across my comments in an old notebook. I felt they were worth sharing:

1) Be mindful of "feeling good" vs "feeling good about yourself" --> I have a tendency to to be lazy and enjoy life but long-term satisfaction comes from pushing yourself in the short term. Sometimes things in the short term are difficult. Don't shy away from them

2) Avoid indulging in a private self image that is at odds with your public self image (this has been the most useful point since I read the book). This type of passive fantasizing can take the place of actually doing things that demonstrate your worth or "specialness" to others and yourself. Examples include:

  • saying one thing but acting another
  • re-imagining arguments to play a more flattering role
  • using social media to project an image that isn't real
  • acting different depending on the social circle
It is important to identify these inconsistencies as they undermine both identity and respect (once you are found out) as well as your tendency to actually accomplish things

3) Differentiate between dreams and goals.
  • Dreams are visions, loose knit ideas
  • Goals are achievable, have steps and can be measured

CHANGE HOW YOU SPEAK:
replace vague passive language with direct concrete
  • "I wish" and "I'd like to"  become "I will try".... 
  • Change "someday" to specific times
  • Avoid make believe talk - exist in reality
    • "I deserve more than I am getting"
    • "I'm entitled to..."
    • "I know it will all come out OK in the end....."
    • "I'm the best person they ever had in this role...."
    • "I shouldn't have to account for my time...."
      • obviously in all of these some truth, but truth is not expressed.... If you want to say such things either back them up with facts or don't
CHANGE HOW YOU ACT:
plan each major project in writing, with a timeline and deadlines
  • lay out mini-goals and check them off
  • you need something to measure your progress against
  1. Keep a "to do" and a "to think about" list
    1. set a time each day to plan 
    2. make lists in the morning or before bed
    3. check during the day
    4. review afterwards to see how you did
  2. Distinguish between things you will definitely finish and things you hope to finish
  3. Use timers/alarms/phones to remind you 
DO INSTEAD OF THINK!

Seek out more interaction with others:
-Don't get lost in dreams
- LISTEN to them DEEPLY 
- Actively seek out their views (nod your head, invite them to speak)
- Keep quiet, don't brag about what you know - make them comfortable