Reflecting

In some ways it feels like I have been on a multi-month bender. No drugs have been involved (well except alcohol and coffee) and at the end of all the fun, trips, girls, and laughs I still find that same old restlessness. Eventually I give up trying to outrun my own discontentment, I pause, and then I turn to the other ways humanity has dealth with it. This process happens almost by accident though. I usually just grow tired of going out and spend a night long stint online sifting through hundreds of pages of articles of new information. I would say this happens about once a month. It wasn't until tonight that I realized this is one of the most important parts of my spiritual search. Where new ideas aired, find fertile soil in my mind and plans for the future are made. In the past, I have turned to science, my own faith, philsophers.... lately I have given a bit of creedence to the thousands of years of knowledge about curing that restless spirit. The collective knowledge we call religion... It's taken a while to open up to these ideas, but they have been very helpful to me over the past few months in finding contentment in my circumstances.

It's also at times like these were I latch on to my new obsession... whether it is travel, sustainability, art, music, or just some silly new hobby I want to. Anyway, it's funny how much growth occurs in these little bursts of attention I have. I don't really know what value this is, but I just wanted to note it for myself more than anything else.